


Portrait, with scars

by Nary



Category: Adventure World (game)
Genre: Anxiety, Community: kink_bingo, Finger Sucking, Hand & Finger Kink, Kink Bingo 2013, Married Characters, Multi, Parenthood, Polyamory, Portraits, Scars, past trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-31
Updated: 2013-07-31
Packaged: 2017-12-22 01:08:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/907105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nary/pseuds/Nary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aleyn looked down at his hands wrapped in Vedran's, and grimaced slightly.  "Maybe I should switch to a coat with pockets.  There's still time, right?"</p><p>Puzzled, Vedran shrugged. "I suppose there would be, especially if I went first.  Why, though?"</p><p>"So I could put my hand in one, and it wouldn't look ugly and mess things up," Aleyn said quietly, embarrassed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Portrait, with scars

Vedran watched Aleyn pace as they waited for the artist to finish setting up in the next room. Neva Inveris was one of the best painters in Highmark, particularly known for her ability to capture remarkable likenesses. It was going to be a birthday present for Ardith - portraits of each of her husbands. It wouldn't be a complete surprise, since planning something that large and time-consuming had to be done fairly far in advance, but she had promised she would make herself scarce while the painter was there, in order to be at least a little surprised by the final products. She had promised to have one of her own done as well, so they would have a full set, but wanted to wait until she wasn't 'as big as a house' (her term, not theirs). Aleyn had gone along with the idea readily enough when Vedran had suggested it, but now, before their first session of posing for preliminary sketches, he seemed to be nervous.

"You do know you'll have to stand still soon," Vedran teased gently.

"I know." Aleyn stopped his anxious pacing, but kept fidgeting with his hair, his tie, his cuffs, seemingly unable to settle down. "Does everything look all right?"

Vedran came over to him and took his hands, mostly to stop him messing himself up any further. "You look very handsome." He had picked out Aleyn's outfit, the sorcerer not trusting himself for such a momentous decision. It was a dark green brocade that would bring out his eyes, and also not clash with Vedran's own choice of a brighter blue silk embroidered with gold. They wouldn't be together in the same portrait - that seemed too blatant a statement of their relationship for something that might someday be seen by the public - but they'd more than likely hang side by side, and he wanted them to look well next to one another. 

Aleyn looked down at his hands wrapped in Vedran's, and grimaced slightly. "Maybe I should switch to a coat with pockets. There's still time, right?"

Puzzled, Vedran shrugged. "I suppose there would be, especially if I went first. Why, though?"

"So I could put my hand in one, and it wouldn't look ugly and mess things up," Aleyn said quietly, embarrassed.

"Oh." Vedran stroked the back of Aleyn's right hand, the maimed one. "I don't think you should hide it for the portrait," he said. "It's part of you - part of who you are. Ardith would want to see it. _I_ want to see it."

"Every time I look at it, it just reminds me... about failing." He didn't go into it more than that, but Vedran knew what it evoked - the deaths of Aleyn's friends (even if it had been temporary) and his own suffering and struggle, culminating in cutting off two of his own fingers and tearing most of the skin off his hand in order to escape from the device that was restraining him. Even now, years later, the scars around his wrist and up the back of his hand were still livid, though a little less red than they'd been when Vedran first met him. And of course the stumps of his missing fingers would always be gnarled with scar tissue. "It was stupid of me," Aleyn muttered, but Vedran stopped him before he could go on.

"You lived, though," he said gently. He lifted Aleyn's hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. "This is how you survived. That's not failure." They had had this same conversation so many times before, but Vedran knew better than most that healing emotional wounds was more difficult than the physical ones. He was willing to keep telling Aleyn these things for as long as it took. 

Continuing his kissing, he moved up to Aleyn's wrist, sliding his cuff back and letting his lips explore the rippled, raised texture of the skin there. It was harder to explain why he thought the scars were beautiful, sexy, although he tried to show Aleyn that as often as he could. "You wouldn't be you without them," he murmured between kisses, "and I love you - every part of you."

There had been a time when Aleyn didn't want anyone to touch his scars. Vedran had been the first lover he'd allowed to do so. (Vedran remembered that first time so clearly, remembered asking him if it was all right, hoping he would say yes...) He had been the first one to show Aleyn how enjoyable the sensations of having them stroked, kissed, and licked could be. Vedran knew the memories of the scars' pain would always be there, but maybe, over time, they could bury them beneath other memories, more pleasurable ones. He sucked lightly on the stumps of Aleyn's fingers, circling his tongue around their bony knuckles, the toughened whorls of flesh, enjoying the way it made his husband catch his breath. It wouldn't do to get too carried away right now, though, so reluctantly he lowered Aleyn's hand, though he kept holding on to it. 

"I... I know you don't mind them," Aleyn stammered, in a huge understatement. "Ardith too. But it's different to think about having someone paint every detail of them and put it up on a wall for people to look at in a hundred years."

Vedran nodded, continuing to stroke his hand, now concentrating on the remaining fingers, long and thin, apart from the rather knobbly knuckles, agile, clever, beautiful... Thinking about what those hands could do made him feel weak in the knees. He composed himself, drawing his thoughts back to the moment so that he could speak again. "Aleyn, you can ask her to minimize them if it bothers you that much. People do that all the time with features they don't care for - asking the artist to make them a little taller, their shoulders stronger, or their nose smaller." He stretched up slightly to kiss Aleyn's nose, which was certainly not small to begin with, and was rewarded with a blushing smile. "I'm not asking you to make the scars the focal point of the painting. I just don't think you should hide them entirely. It wouldn't look like you then, and that's the main point of this whole process. We want to have a record of what we looked like, so when we're old we can point to them and admire how handsome we used to be," he teased, then grew more serious. "And so our children will have them to remember us by someday. And... I think for the children, especially for Saiya and Mhireen, it's important that your scars are part of your portrait." 

Aleyn's shy smile became a solemn expression. Saiya and Mhireen had scars of their own, both having been hurt in the Overlook Disaster that had killed so many, including their parents. Saiya walked with a limp, her ankle crushed by falling debris, and Mhireen had lost an eye, burned out by a falling cinder. Vedran wondered if Aleyn had first been drawn to them, out of all the children at Roscoe's orphanage, because of their injuries, or if it was incidental. The reasons hardly mattered now - they were their children and they loved them. And Aleyn was always conscious of trying to be a good role model for them, and showing them they could do anything they put their minds to. 

"I wouldn't want them to think it was something to be ashamed of," Aleyn said quietly. Vedran suspected that this point of view would sway him more than any amount of kissing and reassurance from him. After a moment of silence followed by a deep, shuddering sigh, Aleyn spoke again. "All right. I won't hide my hand. And I wouldn't ask her to make my nose look smaller, so why would I ask her to minimize the scars? It'll be what it is."

"Okay, I'm glad," Vedran nodded, embracing him. "It's bound to look better than the covers of the Thunderbolt novels, at least. Like the one that made Kallista beet-red, remember? Or the one where Warryn looked the same height as Roscoe?" Aleyn grinned at that, which had been Vedran's goal. He didn't want him to look too somber and serious in his portrait - that wouldn't be like Aleyn either. He straightened his husband's hair one more time, made sure his cravat was properly arranged, and then stepped back. "You look perfect to me," he said, giving Aleyn's hand a final squeeze. "Always."

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on Tumblr at [naryrising](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/naryrising) if you want to ask questions, make requests, or chat!


End file.
